QUAINT

Ah, so my morning started off on a hasty foot, but that's how my Sunday's always are. I got up at 10AM to shower and get ready for mass at 10:30AM. I even decided to shave, thinking I had enough time. I ended up only shaving one leg. It's kind of embarrassing to admit, but that's why I wore pants, for the first time this whole summer, to church. I haven't had plans all week, so today was my first time doing anything in a long while. Tonight I went out for a last dinner with Jon, Khate, and Ana, considering that Jon is leaving tomorrow. We all went out to the Brookside Thai Restaurant on Broad St. after debating which place was really the best to go to. We got plate that were all so good; I got the spicy flat noodles that my sister always gets. We also had Thai iced teas which were AH-MAZING. on immediately went after Khate's glass, while I was already slurping down mine. We all picked at each other's orders, sharing the goodness! We even moved aside glasses from the center of the table to avoid spillage. After failure to calculate our bill portions quick enough, we walked along Broad St. and loitered around McDonald's. Eventually got picked up at QuickCheck where the night began to come to the end. Nothing crazy or outgoing happened tonight, which isn't a problem at all. It was a very chill, funny night and I'm going to miss you Jon Cana :) Hopefully, next year I'll be able to drive and things will be much much easier! Photo is of the cookie mix for the batch of Nestle Tollhouse Chocolate Chip cookies I made today for Jacob. I really wish I could see him tomorrow.. it's been a long weekend without him.

Conversion Factors and Threads

The only reason why I was up early today was because of church. Mass was at 10:30AM and I literally woke up at 10:10AM. For that hour of mass, I was awake - in thought that is. I usually let my mind wander through other things, but my mind focused on the future. What if I convert? Maybe I'll be more involved in our religion than I am now. I mean, I sit here for an hour thinking about other things. Even if I do convert, my perspectives of God will never change. Will it really make my parents change their view of me? I can't think of all of this now. Live in the moments and we'll tackle these dilemmas when they come around.

After church, I went with my father to A.C. Moore. I needed to pick up some beads to fix up my sandals - the design is coming off. I picked up a piece to also fix my bracelet. Additionally, I wanted to start making those "friendship bracelets" that you can always find down the shore. I absolutely lovee those! I started on them. My first one was too short and I'm currently half way through my second, better one. Photo is of my first crappy one! XD

I'm Continuing to Pray For Better

I thought today was good to start off, but reality more or less punched me in the face after church. It's the reality I never wanted to be true. It should have just stayed in the back of my mind as a worry. It's really disappointing when one promises to not do something for someone else or their self. How is it, when all this time I thought I was doing okay by steering away from the chances, that I end up finding out I drove right into it?

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From: Jacob

I Felt that I actually lost you :(

Jun 27, 12:31pm

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From: Jacob

Lately whenever we talk its horrible. Its gotten to the point that I'd rather go through the day alone cuz if we talk we only argue

Jun 27, 12:36pm

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From Jacob

I'm ashamed in myself because the loving care I had for you is gone. I'm sorry

Jun 27, 12:42 pm

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What the hell have I done? We had something relative to perfection and all I did was take everything for granted. Back around December, you told me that was the one thing not to do: take you for granted. I thought that as long as we can get through these problems, everything would be okay in the end- no matter how major or minor an argument was. In reality, things piled up and I've burnt your care out. This is not where my care and determination ends, though. I'm going to fix my mistakes one way or another and I'm figuring that "starting over" will do. I remember after one of the hundreds of arguments we had one time, I promised that every night I would pray to God that me and you will get through it all and that "one day we'll have it all." I still pray and I still believe it. I'm going to get us through this. I promise.

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From: Jacob

Obviously. But the I care about our future more than any fight cuz that's what we promised in the beginning

Jun 27, 8:57pm

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Photo is of a Tumblr post. Recently I've been staying in this room, in my natural state: lethargic and uninspired.

Happy Father's Day, Papa!!

This afternoon was unexpected, to say the least. This afternoon, I woke up and found myself hopping into my brother's new car, on the way to Smashburger. I wasn't really looking forward to eating a burger first thing in the day, but its what ended up happening. Hey, it was noon so I don't think it counts! I have been having a lot of burgers these past two days! Yesterday, I had like three at Deejay's! Anyways, I also went with my siblings for another drive. We dropped off my sister to work, and my brother and I went to the mall after wards. When we arrived back home, it was time for a Filipino Father's Day mass. After the mass, there was a celebratory BBQ in the church parking lot. I stuck by with Anika and Ana, her brother, Stephen, and Orion randomly came by. I ended up hanging out with them and it has been quite a fun night. I feel bad that I didn't come home accordingly at the time I suggested and that I did not have my phone to make up for it. I wanted to go home anxiously for that reason, but I could not, so I enjoyed the moments I was in. Between watching hilarious Youtube videos and watching Orion try to eat a spoonful of cinnamon, tonight was good. Photo is of of a Tumblr post I took just now. Crazy haiir.

Happy BSing!

Here I am, grateful for the end of another day. This has been giving me more hours to close my eyes, and make up for lost hours. Today was cool. It was the first day of finals, and my first two were easy. First perdio I have SAT Prep, so I just chilled this morning. Then, I had French, where as I didn't know anything because my teacher hasn't been here for two weeks. Therefore, I BSed much of my French 2 Final :D I went the the festival with my parents tonight. I may have seemed anti-social, just sitting there, but I just didn't want to go in general. Plus, I was too cold to try to talk to anyone, so I texted haha. Today, I also went on a sort of date with him. we walked to Lil urgers in Nutley and then Stuffed Cupcakes - somethign I've wanted to do for a while. Photo is of the cupcake we got. :D

Chill Day, Set On Summer Mode

I'm definitely gonna eff up my audition tomorrow.. haha. Part of me has already given up on it and I still have like 20 seconds left to write. wamp. Today was chill. Church went by fact, as I allowed myself to drift into a continuous thread of thought about life. I reminisced on good and bad days, on good futures and bad. Something that urks me is that I went to church looking skinny, having not eaten. Then, after lunch, it goes all down hill from there. I still have not pooped yet and my stomach is bloated. I want to stay skinny all day! This afternoon I also went to the mall, after attempting to work on my audition piece. I finally got some B-cup bras, now that I actually measured myself! It does feel more fitting and comfortable, but it makes me a little sad to say I'm not a C-cup haha. I hemmed up some pants today, bought some nice tops, and the skirt I REALLY wanted. Yay for JC Penny. Thank God tomorrow is a delayed opening woot. Maybe I can work on my audition piece! Sike. Photo is of a square of sprinkles that made me happy. :D We bought 50 pc Munchkins on the way back from the mall.

Momma Day

Bleh I have that sour, vomit taste in my mouth right now! I have no idea why. Anyways, today I missed my optician appointment. We purposely went to church at 10:30AM to get to the mall by noon. Yeah, we got there at 12:22AM, and the guy was such a douche! He was like, "You missed your appointment. The doctor left." His tone of voice had such an attitude to it. I wanted to punch him in the face! Well, we ate at the food court and then came back home. Even though it's Mother's Day, we didn't do anything too crazy. We got home and I began to read my ass off. Sparknotes definitely helps in a time like this because last night I left off on page 70 and the books ends at page 235. I finished by like 8:30PM! :D I felt so proud. Then, I decided to watch the movie which was a bad idea. Like most book-based movies, the details were skewed and made me get confused with what really happened. Anyways, I would just like to say Happy Mother's Day to all mothers and motherly figures! I wish my bond with my mother was more of the friendly type, but you can't argue with what you have. I love you, Mama! ♥ Photo is of me in the Sears bathroom waiting for Mama to finish. I think this is gonna become my default on Facebook

He's Having a B.F.! (Bitchfit)

Goodness...I really need to stop baking. It's getting tiring and tempting! There are points where I just wanna eat the brownies for myself >_> I really surprised I actually got all my homework done tongiht..well most of it. I had expected to still be sitting here right now, gouging my eyes out, begging for sleep. Hrm..today was nothing too crazy.. This morning, pa's period came and he had a bitch fit right before church. On the car ride there, he decides he is jsut going to drop my mother, my siter, and I off and he's going home. He's suchhh a girl I swear! Photo to be uploaded is of brownies -_-

SUPAH BOWL SUNDAY!

Yeahh..so I honestly didn't know that today was the big day. I eventually found out after church while eating lunch with a my cousins at a Viet restaurant. The best part about it was that when I found out, I was surprised just for a second, and then I didn't care anymore. Maybe I would be more into it, had I grown up attending these Super Bowl Parties. Well, anyways, I spent the majority of my day texting the love and just relaxing. I'm really trying to not eat as much, but I feel like that has been a fail for the past few weeks. Hopefully, I can find some reform in these upcoming days. I really wish I had a legit picture, but I think this is the best I can get. Lmfao, my guinea pig is evil.

Tiu Tiu Tiu

Sunday Sunday Sunday. I didn't do much today, just slacked around like usual..Church is church and I'm actually singing and participating in a way now we went to the mall for a bit and I got my eyebrows threaded. I can never not cry when I get them done! It's actually kind of funny. I found out that if I kept my original Chinese name, I would've been Stefanellie Tiu. I ate wafers allll day. Gah, I need to stop. Tomorrow we start second semester and things just might turn out good. :) Photo's of cam whoring in the car. haha It's not the best picture...It looks better from far away

It's A Cripple's Race

Wow, I think the odor of smoke is all over me and has gotten me congested. No, not cigarettes; I just finished part of a project where I coffee-stained the paged and burnt the edges. The smart aspect about this is that theres no ventilation where I am! :D Anyways, today was church and limping around is quite a bitch. Running late for church, I was the last one out of the house. We have 14 steps (I counted them when I was younger) downstairs to get out of this place. I hopped on my right foot the whole way down. After church, mama took care of me and wrapped my swollen ankle up :) I love you mamaaa :D Photo's of some chem I was just helping Kate with.

And So They Line-Danced Their Way Through The Night

Tonight was good. Honestly, I didn't want to go to the Santo Ninio celebration. Past experiences with church parties led me to believe I would end up as the loner on her iPod tonight. So I brought it incase. As it turns out, I actually put myself out there and participated in the 2-hour Filipino mass tonight. I couldn't understand a word they were saying, but I sand along best I could. I couldn't laugh along, but I kept my spirits up and my back straight. After mass, we went to the CCD school building for the after party in the basement. I luckily found Kate there, and a couple others that I know. I hung out with her the whole time, though she was supposed to be working clean-up duty for the ngiht. We line danced until sweat was drippin'; down our faces haha. It was quite fun and I'm proud that my initial assumptions of tonight were wrong. Hey, I didn't even use my iPod. Gahh, and still something is wrong. Goodnight, since you wont text me. Photo's of dance presentation by little kids. cute.

Cheat Sheet

So I actually paid attention to church today.. it was pretty wierd. I'm not gonna say that I'm a changed person because knowing me, I'll probably daze off next week and my mind will wander elsewhere. I actually got work done today though. I finished my cheat sheet and whatnot, while webcamming with Ana. Fun stuff, mann. I need to pull my shit together with classes because I can't afford to go down hill from here in any way. Look, I bonded with my papa =0

Go Figure

Nothing great happened today.. I almost passed out at church, go figure. I didn't eat the other night cus I slept the whole day. I'm fine now; the whole day I put up the Christmas Tree.

Who I Used To Be..WTF Jewelry? [100th Post!]

I definitely didn't almost forget to write out this post. shh.

As I listen to Blink-182 right now, it's slightly hard to reflect back on my day..ow -rubs stomach- I have gas.. uhh. Oh church today was interesting. My family came late due to a flat tire and the CCD classes were upstairs, filling in half the pews. Both factors equaled the fact that we had to stand up the entire hour. >.> That, my friends, is never fun. Among the pains of standing in heels for an hour, I also stood next to a man who was breathing oh-so-heavily. He kept making long, grunting noises. Every three seconds I would glace over my shoulder and just think like..wtf? Go get an inhaler. haha Just kidding. I just really couldn't understand why he was making the noises. I also observed one of the teachers..I think she has Torrets or something. >.> She would twitch her head in a certain way to the right side like 5 times, and then another two times to the left! Pretty wierd..oh the things you see from behind..[no dirty thoughts intended :P] Hrmm..I went to the mall today too- I spammed on purchasing jewelry and got this pretty amazing hat with a hamster on it. :) This certain kid I know has a similar one with a beaver, but I think mines better! The jewelry part still surprises me though..I feel so girly..it's a big change from who I used to be a couple years back, with big sweaters and messy hair. I didn't care about maintaining how I looked. Though my hair still may look like crap, I do prefer where I'm at now. :D The confidence level is definitely up there. hah.

Lazy Bum

Sundays can be so passive.. I actually went to church today, dressed up nicely and somewhat willing to go. I really prefer going at 10:30AM because thats when a lot of people are there and its not too late in the day. I sat next to Kim's parents haha.. I attempted to do homework today, but that completely failed. I've been such a bummy, lazy sophmore.. Go Team.

Oh Sunday

Sundays can be such a bore sometimes. Church isn't very exciting, so that doesn't help. After church, I ended up being the only one awake in my family. I needed some make-up such as eye shadow and eyeliner for marching band, so I decided to leave on my own to Stop & Shop. I was upset to find that they didn't have the right shades that I need and so I left. I didn't want to come home empty handed, as so being the money-spending addict, I just decided to pass by McDonald's and get a $1 Sweet Tea. It was pretty good, not gonna lie. :D But I think I'm forming another cavity on my top right. D: Oh well. Thats life. That Sunday I also went to Walgreens with my father to get the makeup that I actually needed and to develop some pictures. This one here, was one of them.

Oh Sunday.

Sunday Sunday Sunday. So when I got home last night, I texted a couple friends for a while and ended up passing out on my parents' bed. I woke up this morning with a very sore, achy feeling. I'm going to take the wild guess that it was because I slept on my stomach with three pillows under me, in the most awkward position. Hell, I didn't care; I was too tired to, anyways! I woke up at 11:30AM and hopped straight into the shower. My entire family was yelling at me for doing so because we had to be at church by noon. They were simply saying I wasn't going to have time! Boy, did I prove them wrong. I took a shower, got dressed, and we got to the church with 5 minutes still to spare. Church was boring as usual. When we got home, we ate and then headed to the mall. I had bought a referral for my contact and a bag I've been eyeing for quite a while now. Tonight, I went to the movies with the Sentinas, the Bonghanoys, Fetus, Ana, and the Pinanos. Goodness, thats like all siblings! ..haha me, Ana, and Fetus might as well be siblings. We saw a guy that looked like the older version of Fetus andI just had to point him out. The movie we saw was 9. It was okay, but I expected better. I'm dreading tomorrow for the sake of school, but there is one good aspect to it. Practice afterwards and getting to see Jacob :D Oh, and tonight was the first time I've ever had a Jones' drink! Flavored Banana Strawberry, it was good. The caps are the most amazing part!

Peace Be With You - Amen

Hrm.. Sunday. I actually went to church t0day!! I hadn't gone for two weeks prior to that. Last week, I was too busy dying at my fathers company picnic, and the week before that I kind of just skipped out to go to Mt. Creek. hehe..

I really thought we were all going that morning. I was wrong. Apparently my parents got into a stupid argument whether or not my mom took a shower or not. It was like the biggest misunderstanding in the world, but whatever. My parents argue once in a while, but it usually settles down after a while. That morning only my sister and I attended church. As I sit there in the pew, I never really pay attention to the service. All I can ever really think about is new sabre work we learned. I go over it again and again, making sure I get it right. But what can I say? Catholic masses aren't the most exciting..

Cooookies

So there is apparently no post for August 9, 2009 BECAUSE I fell asleep around 5PM and woke up at 3:30AM!!!! But in all, its my fault. The night before that, I slept around 4AM and had to wake up that Sunday at 7:30AM to catch the 8AM mass..uhh I think it was because..oh. It was because we wanted to spend time with my mom since the passing of her father and my sister had work that afternoon by 2PM! .. see. my memory isn't that bad >.>Anyways..my on August 9th, I made cookies. :) Thats my broad post make-up for yesterday. xD