Relaxing & Surrounded By Ice Cream

Oh, it felt so good to sleep through the night. For the past two days I was out and about, walking up and down a mountain and all around the city. I took today to just chill out and relax. I slept in until around 1PM and took my shower to clean off yesterday's chlorine. I decided to stay in for the day. Later in the afternoon around 6:30PM I got dropped off at Applegate Farm to keep Roland company through his 6PM-11PM shift. I found myself "people watching" as this one little boy made a mess of his vanilla cone - it was the cutest. These two little girls were picking out their flavors and they seemed a little controlling. These group of girls were having their night out. Roland and I didn't get to talk much because of customers ofcourse, but I didn't mind it in the least. Watching him work really got me thinking of work myself. I need to find a job this winter, and I've been really looking recently. I've been tired from the past few days that I just needed to have a chill night. So here I am back home still laid back and even a little tired from yesterday still.Photo is of Sprinkles - the amazing creepy cow.

We Saved a Bird Today & I Helped the Rookies

There is something I've always disliked about doing this 365 Project: the nights where you are just plain tired and already in bed and the thought hits you "I still need to post!". A wide range of curses mosh in your head because there is no other choice other than to get up and write it because you need to keep up. But then again, this is why I decided to do this. I put myself to this challenge and of course, I'm not gonna love it all the time. I can't help but feel proud at how dedicated I've been to this.

Today was once again, HOT. This Wednesday was supposed to be ours. Your brother was supposed to go to 6 Flags with the maid and the house would be ours. Unfortunately, he didn't go because it was too hot. I left the house early anyways. You couldn't go out, so I just stayed at the high school where they were having a morning practice for the band. When I found my way there, I saw them on the field so I just chilled out there for a while. I also eventually went inside to chill in the nice, air-conditioned surroundings. When the band had sectionals, I hopped from section to section meeting rookies and even helping out with music. I felt comfortable. Part of me prefers these simple practices that are relaxed and sometimes makes me wonder why I didn't just march flute. Then again, I know where my passions are and where my perfectionist qualities come into character - guard. Even with rehearsal tonight, I can't help but think that maybe I wasn't meant to exactly be a captain. I like perfecting myself solely because I find it easier. I feel bad when I try to help someone and they have to deal with my chaotic mind. I don't say it to sound self-righteous. I'm just more of the introvert who is better at working on their self. But my own characteristics are not going to get the best of me and prevent me from being who I want to be. As wrong as it sounds, I want to be someone else. I can grow tired of being the shy introvert. I want to be a leader. At HOBY, they told us hey, even if your not a leader, pretend to be one. Pretend to be strong, organized, and set. That's what a leader does, anyway. So, for the greatest sake of this guard, I am going to pretend to be a great captain and do the best that I can. If I pretend enough, I will be.

Today I also got to "have our day". It may not have been what we wanted: a whole house to us, but it was anything. and I was willing to settle for "anything" just to be with you. I stayed for a while - I even got to watch you play Drake's Fortune. It was best that I didn't play because even you said that the part you were at was nerve-racking. Unfortunately, those nervous feelings and paranoia of getting caught at your house enveloped me and I could not help but leave early/on time to get out of there. As it turns out, she didn't come home for another hour! Just my luck -__-' Photos are of Roland ringing me and my Medium Graham Central Station and of my visit this morning.

Chillen, Grillen, And Conversing On The DL.

Well, today was a chill game of waiting. After the useless parade, Jaelynn and I went to Alo's to keep him company for the day. Joriz had left him to go to the beach and Roland just plainly did not want to come. Alo has definitely been a good friend, so it was only right that I be a good friend, proportionately. As he grilled like no tomorrow, we ate some of it which tasted amazing. Also, we had discussed big topic in life right now: dramas, concern, problems, etc. The entire time, we talked about a specific subject, with all hopes in it. Oh, he taught us how to shoot his bow and arrows today! Archery is an uncommon thing to be capable of doing these days, but who cares? It was pretty fun learning how to hold it right and shoot well, targeting the haystack only yards away. Failure followed along here and there, but I miraculously hit it right on the Arizona can on the first shot ever! I jumped up and down like a little girl haha. Our poor judgments resulted in missin gthe haystack and going into the neighbor's yard, hitting the nice, white fence, the ground, and even into the next house over! We stayed until 5:30PM when Joriz came back and we took her to work. Jaelynn, Alo, and I got the Farm and for once, I didn't feel too bad eating it! (Whadda fatty, right?) Driving around, I got to ride in a drift! woooot haha. Then, we chilled at Jeffrey's house for a while, but certain intentions there did not go according to plan. It'll work out, I jus tknow it. Photos are from my first win and Jae's first Farm! :D

Worth The Risks

So far this week is going good and we still have Dorney Park on Friday to look forward to!!! Today was an unexpected plan till about 8th period. After school, we spent the day with Joriz and Alo. When we double date, it's something honestly very comfortable. We can virtually talk to them about anything and the great part about it is that they've been there. They understand the majority of things we say or complain about. Joriz had work, so we chilled at Applegate Farm with her and we got "The Farm"!! Let's see.. 4 scoops of Graham Central Station, 4 scoops of Ice Cream Cake, 4 scoops of ButterPecan, and 4 scoops of another that I can't recall. Oh - and then 4 toppings: hot fudge, caramel, sprinkles, and cherries! :) Sooo fattening and good! We stayed until 6 and chilled out, then we went to the mall to get Joriz a phone case. It made me happy to be in public with you. Maybe I'm a nerd for wearing your sweater the whole time because it rained. :) Your kisses felt so soft and nice. I definitely feel like I'm falling in love with you like we are back in September. :) God, you make me feel so happy and it is my job to make you feel the same about me! After wards, we hit Hooters for some amazing wiinggs! ;D Tonight was your first time and my second. Unfortunately we all got into an open argument that killed the joy of the day, but I felt so happy to have had that conversation. I teared up because finally, I had a second and third opinion that didn't make me feel so wrong. Joriz was right when she said that there are so many times I always feel wrong, even with the argument possibly on my side. I have found myself finding that I have lost my credibility sometimes. Anyways, we climbed back out of that hole and continued to eat on! Goodness, I have no idea how I ate the amount I did on top of "The Farm"! I haven't eaten anything since! On the way back home, I was hoping to lie back into your arm, full, satisfied, and relaxed. Unfortunately, we could afford that. Your parents called and said they were on the way to pick you up from "ushering at the concert". I was so thankful that there was actually a concert tonight as an alibi! As soon as you got off the phone with you mother, you began to hyperventilate and I didn't know what else to do but pull you close to me and hold you tightly. Sure, I was scared, too, but your safety definitely came first. I kissed the side of your face, your temple, and in my mind, I prayed to God that you would be okay. "Everything will be okay" I promised. Our alibi was good. Thanks to Alo's driving skeeeeelz, we got back to town and right when we got to the front of the MS you parents were around the corner, so we went around back and dropped you off there. As it turned out, everything was good and you were safe. My heart was able to breathe. All the risks are worth it sometimes. If we can afford days like this again, why not do it? We just need to be really careful with back up plans and everything! Photo is of "The Farm"!! The love claimed the shirt that comes with it xD Other is of something I can' =t believe you did. haha

A Sprinkle of Estrogen, Please

Today was interesting.. Part of me really wished you came around with us to get some ice cream.. It would mean the world to me if you had tagged along, but I can't have everything my way. I know that. But for what its worth, I pray that both sides of my life can get along with eachother.. I want to live a life that is whole and not split into two parts. Even in my case its hard to feel comfortable with you and your friends. You may not like her and she may not like you, but its just something i wish for.

I miss the girl friends who Ive always hung out with regardless. When I hang out with him its great, but sometimes theres too much testosterone in the atmosphere..Every friend we are familiar with is a guy. Its nice to have those female vibes around, too once in a while. Its part of the reason why I wish you tagged along too.. We can laugh hysterically and practically act like guys, but theres a difference still. I don't say I hate hanging out with them or regret it, I just feel a void of estrogen .. Its like being the only girl in the family.. Say its you, your husband , and 2 boys. You love you family to death, but you wish you had another girl around. It was fun chilling out at the tennis courts for the rest of the night.. So many asians! lmao . Photos of what mama loks like every night, watching TFC. Lol

Monthary

I favor the idea of forgetting the events of earlier today during school. But story short, it involved uncalled for distance, feelings of being upset, and a shed of a couple tears on Rey's Eeyore plush. >.>

As for this afternoon, thing mended up. Even after period 12, my mind was still unsettled. I skipped the guard's ice cream party to be with you. That decision was a very easy one because I needed to know what was going on and hey, I'd rather be with you on any Friday, and especially this one in particular. I'm not such a sucker for dates, but as of today, we've been together for a month. =] It really had been an amazing month being able to spend every day with you, minus those dreaded weekends! Some days weren't the best, but it all molded together in the end into something better. Being able to lay with you somehow always makes my day 10x better, forgetting anything bad thats happened prior. I love you.

BEST COLORGUARD IN NJ 09-10

Today was an extremely great turnout! Your 2009-10 USSBA Best Colorguard in the state, for the second year in the row, is your one and only Belleville! :D I'm so happy to know we came out strongest in the state, even with all my doubts on the line. When we got off the field, I didn't think that our show was the best it could've been. Although, when I looked over a recording of the show with Anna and Jaelynn, I was so proud of how we did! I guess the personal perspective of how we perform isn't always the same as how we are viewed from the audience. Unfortunately, our score dropped down like 4 points, but we can blame the drumline for that, who came in 8th place haha. We placed 4th out of 17 2A bands.. I personally think we could have gotten first, but once again, we look to the band about that. =P Guard gets a ice cream party woooot! XD