Friday, May 14, 2010

My Self-Confidence Feels Strong Than Ever

So I could start off with the greatest accomplishment of tonight, but they way my heart feels from the last events of tonight brought me back to 6 months ago. After the Talent Show, we walked to Wendy's with Julian. There was no awkwardness and I was with you. There was one point where you put your arm around me and we continued to walk and I felt..safe and loved. Then, when I gave you a ride home, I leaned into the nook of your neck the entire time. Just that alone had me in my happiest place - funniest thing: it's not in my mind, as the saying goes. You are real. We are real. This love is my happiest place. Then, as soon as your head leaned in towards mine and we kissed, nostalgia could have knocked me off my seat. The feeling of sitting so close to you and share kisses where each made my cheeks warm up to your love (no embarrassment, no nothing) brought me back to that one, single time we went to the movies. "Except we weren't this close," you said. There was no chair arm between us; we were so godly close.

Now onto tonight itself. I can't believe it. I did the Talent Show. I feel like this is definitely one of my greatest accomplishments because in a nutshell, I destroyed something that I first joined with hesitation. Being a beginner at doing any choreo, I learned the entire show in a matter of four days! It wasn't that I just learned it either. I was able to move with my own body with confidence. I knew what I was doing and I didn't let the nervousness of being on stage try to ruin it. As I was told, it was good but not as good as our previous rehearsal. I honestly don't mind because hey, I'm new and we are all really proud of ourselves! Being nervous is something understand and I know that from experience. I really want to get more into dancing because hey, I did it when I was 8 and was good. There is no legitimate reason for me to not pick it back up! My self-confidence has gone from an 80 to a 90 which means just about everything to me. I really want to keep dancing, no lie. Photo ain't exactly a pretty picture. It is just something I took while lying on the table after we practiced a little in the auditorium. Boy was it hot in there!

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